Stuffing the suggestion box of the Evan Almighty

One quick note; if God plans to upgrade our species design assuming he/she/it wants to or has budget for it, please design a dribble free penis.  I don’t know how many times, even after owning my member for every day of my life, or renting it, depending on your outlook, I pee and then I get dribble, sometime after I tap, down the side of my legs like it was splashed upwards from an invisible miniature spitting gnome at my feet. I urinate sitting down at home because it’s neater, keeping me from having to clean the toilet every fifteen minutes because when I aim standing up I can start drifting in my thoughts and next thing I’ve crashed my jet into the mountain, so to speak; i.e., gone on the wall.  Plus it’s just not ladylike.  So I go sitting down. All I ask is that, using some form of New Physics, quantum mechanics and mechanical engineering, to redesign the penis so it empties out, full force without having to tap fifteen to one million times. It’s a flawed organ. And another suggestion is to put the scrotum on the inside of the body, not the outside.  It’s like having your liver in a sack stapled to your side. Imagine how it must hurt if someone smacks you in your liver sack.  The only time I have used the word elephantine was in the men’s locker room a few years ago at my gym when an older naked man had scrotum that were so large that other scrotum in the room could have revolved around them like satellites. These were as abnormally large to his body as Charlie Brown’s head to his body.  In that moment, I saw something elephantine and that to me is the only useful purpose for keeping testicles dangling on our outsides, so I could use that word.   Men’s bodies came first according to the Bible so we were practice for the superior female body. In my opinion.


Facebook Twitter Linkedin Email

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *